So I am a nervous reck

So we only have one week left until Chris will be home again and I don't even know what to do with myself. I have so much I would like to accomplish, but all I really want to do is sit on our couch eat nothing but sweets and feel sorry for myself. That is the honest truth! Even though that sounds awesome to me I can't do that. I have to keep pushing forward and be the best mother and the best wife that I can be. Now is the time when all my boys need me the most and I hope and constantly pray that I can be that for them. I really couldn't have done this without God on my side. It is so miserable being away from the love of my life, my best friend, and the best father for my children. This has been the best experiance and the most important experiance of my whole life.  It really took a lot of myself to be strong for our kids and to support my husband while he was at sea. I felt like above all else that was my most important job and I know in my heart that I did the best that I knew how. I can't wait to see my husbands face again and all I really know at this point is that God is the only one that can get me through this hard time with such grace and peace. I give God all the glory!

So we got good word that Chris will be able to fly home once his ship reaches Hawaii. So we are expecting him home a week earlier than originally planned. I am so excited and stressed. I know how close we are to seeing each other again. I keep thinking of how that moment is going to feel. I hope that it feels as if no time has passed before. I pray that Gavin still remembers his Daddy and that Logan is just drawn to him as if he was here all along. We are doing great and I just hope that I can keep myself busy enough until he comes home.

So Close

We are getting down to the end of christopher's deployment and I am starting to get excited and nervious about his return. When I think of him getting to meet his second son I am overwhelmed with emotions. I feel so much joy with Logan in our family and Chris has been missing out on that joy. I can't wait to see the expression that comes over his face when we see each other again. He has been so missed, but this time has really created much change and I have learned so much more about myself that I wouldn't have learned otherwise. I love him so much and thank him everyday for his service. 

A Military Wife

A military wife is mostly girl.

She wonders if this is worth the sacrifice. An ideal military wife has the patience of an angel, the flexibility of putty, the wisdom of a scholar and the stamina of a horse. If she dislikes money, it helps.

She is sentimental, carrying her memories with her in an old footlocker. One might say she is a bigamist, sharing her husband with a demanding entity called "duty." When duty calls, she becomes No.2 wife. Until she accepts this fact, her life can be miserable.

She is above all a woman who married a man who offered her the permanency of a gypsy, the miseries of loneliness, the frustration of conformity and the security of love.

Sitting among her packing boxes with squabbling children nearby, she is sometimes willing to chuck it all in until she hears the firm step and cheerful voice of the lug who gave her all this.

Then she is happy to be... his military wife.

Update

Things are going well as we were informed that Christopher will be returning home on Oct 10th. We are doing our best to be as busy as possible until then as well as planning a great welcome home suprise. Gavin has moved on from the binky and Logan is doing great on a bottle and sleeping well at night. We feel so blessed and thank God for all that is happening in our life. 

Organic

So I have decided to go organic to improve on what we are consuming. I am really excited about this new change in our lifestyle. This may sound very strange to some people, but I feel closer to nature and also much closer to God now than ever. It has a lot to do with recycling, using hybrid diapers, and choosing to eat organic. I just feel like I am in such a good place in my life and I feel like I am doing really well because I am forced to do it on my own in this moment and because of our two wonderful boys that challange me to be better everyday. It is amazing being green!

Special Thanks

I really wanted to take a moment to give special thanks to my wonderful husband for his service to our country and to this family. I wanted to also thank him for making me a mother to our two beautiful boys. I am so full of happiness each morning when I wake to see our children's faces. I feel so honored to have children with  such a awesome, brave and loving man. We miss seeing your face, but we always carry you in our hearts.